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Movie Review : Bodyguard
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| | Bodyguard
Artists (Cast) : Asrani, Chetan Hansraj, Hazel Keech, Mahesh Manjrekar, Mohan Kapoor, Raj Babbar, Rajat Rawail, Salman Khan, Kareena Kapoor
Producer : Alvira Agnihotri, Atul Agnihotri
Director : Siddique
Production Company(S) : Reel Life Production, Funky Buddha Productions
Music Director : Pritam Chakraborty (A.K.A. Pritam)
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Friday, September 02, 2011 10:51:57 AM (IST)
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Anaam, Bollywood Trade Editorial
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SALMAN KHAN and KAREENA KAPOOR in BODYGUARD
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The film sends you into a hypnotic deep sleep and is seriously recommended as an essential therapy for insomniacs.
Provided, you don’t find this extremely curious, and concerned Salman well-wisher in the next seat goading you with questions like ‘who are the morons who wrote the film and why the retired badshah of screenplay writing Salim Khan Saab did not help them?’ After you enlighten him with the fact that Salim Khan Saab actually is the script consultant to the project, the person falls silent, shocked and shaken. It’s time to revert to a pleasant uninterrupted snooze thereafter to get your money’s worth.
The story of the film is simple and complex. Its three key fight sequences are simple and sumptuous, and the romantic track is complex and cold. Salman Bhai bursts out of his tight fitting shirt in the last fight scene just before the climax, around the time you will be waking up to put on your shoes to leave the theatre. And as the villains (Aditya Pancholi and Mahesh Manjrekar) are sufficiently thrashed, and demolished in a pool of dirty water, there begins a supposedly touching but convoluted 15-minutes finale to Lovely Singh’s (Salman Khan) cell-phone love story with an unknown and unseen ‘Chaya’.
So, you must be wondering who is the heroine of the film Chaya, Divya, or Maya! Of course it is Kareena Kapoor with an extremely limited wardrobe. Salman Bhai is madam’s servile Bodyguard with a pub bouncer’s gorilla walk. Kareena performs the dual role of Divya in person and Chaya on a cell phone. And there is this junior Sartaj Singh, Salman Bhai’s son, named after his benefactor and ‘maalik’ (Raj Babbar) but Kareena is not his mother. But who is the mother? The answer lies in a leather bound diary. It is one of those attempts to introduce last moment twists into the screenplay that turns out to be a damp squib since it is too tortuous to be digested by the dumbest of Salman acolytes.
The film’s heaviest surprise package is Sunami Singh (Rajat Rawail). Almost half of the film is devoted to his unfathomable antiques meant to make you laugh. Nobody does. He is obviously a khaye peeye baap ka khaya peeya beta. He looks like Rahul Rawail’s son, probably trained at his Stella Adler Academy, with specialisation in playing an enormously pitiable and imbecile fat boy. ‘Sallu Bhai Rawail sahab ke kisi purane ‘ehsaan’ ka badla chuka rahe the aur probably audience se READYko hit karne ka badla le rahe the.’
‘Ehsaan’ incidentally is the recurring theme of the film. Bhai uses his punch line ‘mujh par itna ehsaan karo ki koi ehsaan mat karo’ a bit too often to make an impact. There are rare gems of dialogue like ‘jhad ne jhad diya’ taken straight from some book of 'alliterative quotable quotes for idiots'. The other remarkable and intriguing aspect of the film is that the audience cries when it is supposed to laugh, laughs when it is supposed to cry, and falls asleep when it is supposed to stay awake. The unique and prominent ‘money saver’ element of the film, the ill-fitting costumes and wigs of the supporting cast, is worth a mention too. And the ‘garam’ and lava item number of Salman and Katrina Kaif is as hot and steaming as deep-frozen stone-cold Chetna Kulfi.
Sallu Miyan and his director Siddique have short-changed the festival audiences this Eid and have served them ‘baasi kichada’ instead of a sumptuous feast of aromatic ‘dumpukht mutton biriyani’ and ‘badami doodh sevaeeyan’. However, the festive and forgiving mood of the people may help the film reap a rich harvest during the overextended 5-days weekend. That should be enough for the film’s producers and distributors to make enough money and complete the hat trick of Salman hits.
One hopes that BODYGUARD sets off the warning alarm among the wise people in Salman Bhai’s camp. The ice on which he has been walking tall and heavy has already thinned, and big cracks are all there to see. If his family and he continue to be blind to this reality in their unabashed pursuit of moolah at the cost of his trusting fans, the dream run may not last long. This film tests the audience adulation and patience to the farthest and the expected steep drop in box office collections Monday onwards will be a testimony to the obvious fact.
We give two stars to the film - one for its well-choreographed and innovative fight sequences and one as our Eid greetings and ‘get well soon’ wish to Salman Bhai.
Rating - 2/5
Tags : Bodyguard Movie Review, Bodyguard Movie, Salman Khan, Kareena Kapoor, Mahesh Manjrekar, Shatrughan Sinha, Aditya Pancholi, Hazel Keech, Rajat Rawail, Asrani, Katrina Kaif, Raj Babbar, Mohan Kapoor, Himani Shivpuri, Siddique, Shabbir Ahmed and Neelesh Misra, Pritam and Himesh Reshammiya
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